There is Nothing there, I tell the Owner.

That is Impossible, says the Owner.

You come and Look for yourself, I say.

I see Something, says the Owner.

That is not Something, I say, that is a Space where Something Should Be. A Space in which there is Nothing.

Victor Hugo said is no such thing as Nothing, says the Owner. Everything is something. Nothing is nothing. Even the phrase ‘there is nothing’ is an impossibility since the use of the word ‘is’ implies the existence of an observer.

There must be Nothing wherever there is not Something, I say. If we were not required to have evidence to back our Existential Claims, I say, where would we be, I say. You are a scientist, I say. You must start from a presumption of Nothing, I say. You cannot just throw in Something Willy Nilly, I say. To prevent the intrusion of superfluous entities, you must start with the empty world and admit only those Entities that can Prove Themselves, I say.

The Moral Dog is quoting the view of René Descartes, says the Owner, but the Presumption that there can ever have been Nothing is a Hard One. St. Augustine said we should not start at the beginning, nor at the end, but where we are, in the middle. We reach a verdict about the Existence of Controversial Things by assessing how well they harmonise with those things we have established as Something. If we start from Nothing, we are beyond the limits of our own Conception.

You cannot Start in the Middle just because it Suits You, I say. That is like suggesting that Freezers come with Lollies and that there is No Necessity for Owners to Purchase them for Moral Dogs, I say. Surely it is more likely that we started with Nothing and Noone, I say. And built from it Something and Someone, I say. Noone must have been there before Someone, I say. Emptiness must have come before Lollies. I say.

Even if Nothing could be imagined, says the Owner, Our Experience is indisputably of Something. Nothing cannot return now that there is Something.

It most Definitely Can, I say. I have seen it, I say. With my Own Eyes, I say. If Nothing is Nothing then Something is Something, I say. I am not pretending that Something is Nothing or that Nothing is Something, I say. I am just questioning the Entire Futility of Consciousness on the Basis that there, is, in fact, a Patch of Nothing amidst the Something, I say. It haunts my very Existence and Throws it into Question, I say. It fractures time and space, I say. It is both a Scientific Impossibility and a Metaphysical Reality, I say. It is a Chasm, I say, that reaches to the very heart of the Moral Dog, I say.

So where is this Nothing? Says the Owner.

In the Freezer, I say, where the Moral Dog’s Lollies should be.

The Owner is ordering some more Lollies. She seems Exhausted.

Categories: dignity dog dog philosophy nothing

Hergest the Hound

I am a dog of many thoughts.