The Moral Dog is lying on his Cushion, feeling Oppressed.

What is Wrong? Asks the Owner.

Rousseau said the Moral Dog is Born free, and Everywhere he is in Chains, I say. I am Oppressed, I say.

Who is Oppressing the Moral Dog? Asks the Owner.

I am Oppressed by the House, I say. I am not running Wild and Free, I say. The House is oppressing the Physical Freedom that is my Birthright, I say.

But the Moral Dog is lying on a Cushion, says the Owner. He does not appear to be testing the Boundaries of Freedom, says the Owner.

That is because the Moral Dog has learned what happens to Moral Dogs who attempt to Exit via the Wall. I say. There is nothing quite as Painful as a Wall for Oppressing a Moral Dog, I say. One does not Try it Twice, I say. This is exactly what Rousseau was warning us about, I say.

Then let us go to the Park, says the Owner, and the Moral Dog can run Wild and Free.

We go to the Park.

Is the Moral Dog happy now? Asks the Owner. Can the Moral Dog not run Wild and Free?

No, I say. The Moral Dog is feeling Oppressed.

Who is Oppressing the Moral Dog? Asks the Owner.

I am Oppressed by the Park, I say. There is a sign on the Gate to the Pond which states that Dogs Shall Not Pass, I say. This Severely Restricts my Ability to run Wild and Free, I say. The Park is oppressing the Physical Freedom that is my Birthright, I say. It has Removed some of my Freedoms and handed them, without Caveat, to Ducks, I say. What sort of Freedom do you call that? I say. This is exactly what Rousseau was warning us about, I say.

Then let us go to the Heath, says the Owner.

We go to the Heath.

Is the Moral Dog happy now? Asks the Owner.

No, I say. The Moral Dog is feeling Oppressed.

Who is Oppressing the Moral Dog? Asks the Owner.

I am Oppressed by the Heath, I say.

But the Moral Dog cannot see the Edge of the Heath, says the Owner. The Heath is Enormous.

That does not help, I say, since I know that the Edge of the Heath is There, I say. I can feel it Looming through my Subconscious, I say. Freedom is no use to those who are being Loomed at, I say. The Heath is oppressing the Physical Freedom that is my Birthright, I say.

But the Moral Dog can run as far as he wishes to Run, says the Owner. How can the Moral Dog not be Free if he can Run as far as he Wishes to Run? says the Owner.

Because the fact that the Moral Dog’s current wishes regarding Wildness and Freeness happen to be Compatible with the Oppressive Boundaries Forced up him by the Heath is at best Coincidence and at worst evidence of a Sinister and Mind-Bending Plot, I say. It is quite clear what the Heath is Up To, I say. No amount of Hiding behind Enormousness can conceal its Oppressive Attitudes, I say. This is exactly what Rousseau was warning us about, I say.

Well, says the Owner, I suppose we could go to the Countryside.

And could the Moral Dog Run Wild and Free in the Countryside? I ask.

The Moral Dog Could Run Absolutely as Far as he is Able in the Countryside, says the Owner.

What do you mean, as Far as he is Able? I ask.

Well, says the Owner, there are Limits to the Range of a Moral Dog, however Wild and Free. He is, after all, A Dog. The Limits on his Wildness and Freedom are therefore only those he Sets Himself, as a Dog. The Moral Dog is as Free as he Wishes to be, as Free as he is Capable of Being, and as Free has his Body and Soul can Sustain.

I cannot believe it, I say. Once again, the Moral Dog is Oppressed, I say.

Who is now Oppressing the Moral Dog? Asks the Owner.

It is the Moral Dog himself, I say. The Moral Dog himself is oppressing the Physical Freedom that is his Birthright, I say. What a Slippery Eel the Moral Dog has turned out to be, I say. It is a Travesty, I say. I might as well go back and lie on my Cushion, I say. For all the Freedom I can Actually Enjoy, I say.

It is as Rousseau said, says the Owner. The Moral Dog is Born free, and Everywhere he is in Chains.

Categories: dignity dog dog philosophy

Hergest the Hound

I am a dog of many thoughts.