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Oct 16th. The Very Small Human.

The Very Small Human comes to visit. It is small and giggly with ginger hair and it does not seem to fully speak Human. However, it speaks excellent Puppy.

We spend the day running round and round the sofa. The small human has an inexhaustible wish to possess the bouncy ball but is completely incapable of holding onto it for more than a second. I return it carefully and it shrieks and giggles. Occasionally its Owner takes it away from me and makes it eat cucumber. Fortunately the Very Small Human also speaks Screaming, which appears to be a very effective language when you prefer to engage with the Moral Dog than to eat cucumber. When the Very Small Human speaks Screaming all the other Humans put it back on the floor and we resume our game.

Later, the Very Small Human is taken away. I am bereft. I lie on my cushion looking at the Owner in a bereft kind of Fashion. I tell her I am missing the Very Small Human and I want one of My Own. She tries to tell me that Moral Dogs cannot own Very Small Humans, but I have heard otherwise. There are many dogs in the park that own Small Humans and parade them proudly.

The Owner concedes that this is true. Then she explains that the production process for a Very Small Human just like that one was very complicated, as it entailed her producing a Very Small Human herself, growing it carefully until it became a Fully Grown Human, and then the Fully Grown Human producing a Very Small Human of its own. I agree that this sounds complicated but I am not sure why she doesn’t, in that case, insist on simply keeping that one. She says the Very Small Human has a say in things so that wouldn’t work, but we will be able to continue to borrow it occasionally. She offers me Squeaky Cat in consolation but Squeaky Cat has lost his Squeaker and in any case never giggled, and so is no longer able to console me.

I am about to point this out when I realise that the Owner, also, is looking bereft. I realise that she too would have liked to keep the Very Small Human.

I fetch Squeaky Cat and put it on her knee even though I realise now is not the moment to expect cheese.

The Moral Dog. Sensitivity on four legs.

Categories: dignity dog dog philosophy

Hergest the Hound

I am a dog of many thoughts.

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