I do not want to walk that way, I say to the Owner. Why not? Asks the Owner, we always walk that way. There is a Telephone Mast there, I say. I heard it might give me Covid virus. A Telephone Mast cannot give you a Virus, says the Owner. […]
Look, says the Owner, how Quiet it is on the Heath. It is not quiet back where we parked, I say. That man was either Playing the Bagpipes or Murdering a Piglet. I am not sure which. That, says the Owner, is the joy of Learning the Bagpipes. But I […]
The Owner has developed an Extremely Peculiar Habit. Her obsession with Collecting the Rear End Offerings of the Moral Dog seem to have extended into Collecting Similar Offerings from Other Dogs. Moreover, she is doing it wearing Blue Plastic Gloves and Strange Round Sunglasses, and carrying a Huge Orange Bag. […]
I did not like the Man on the Park Bench who said I should be on a Lead, I say. You have to be Tolerant, says the Owner, he is Afraid. When you asked him why he thought that, he said it was the Law, I say. He thought that […]
They are confining Cats indoors if their Owners might have Covid, says the Owner. That sounds an excellent plan, I say, and a Just Punishment for Hissing at the Moral Dog. It is not a punishment, says the Owner. It is a precaution, since Cats seem able to pass Covid […]
The Owner says the Man’s Hair needs cutting. Indeed, I am becoming Rather Shaggy, he says. I will do it, says the Owner. In your Dreams, says the Man. You are a Doctor, not a Hairdresser. The Moral Dog could do it, I say, give me the Scissors. I do […]
Hergest, says the Owner, stop Howling. It is traditional, I say. I need to communicate with the Brotherhood of Dogs, I say. I Howl again. Can you not just speak to them in the Park? Asks the Owner. You may be attracting Hyaenas. No, I say, because our limited exercise […]
The Owner says the Prime Minister and all his Men have Covid. It is quite a coincidence that they all caught it at the same time, I say. How very unlucky that is, I say. Yes, says the Owner. Were they not practising Social Distancing? I ask. It seems not, […]
The Owner and the Man and I go for our Daily Walk on the Heath. There are a few Humans about but they Avoid us by stepping off the path in wide circles. Is it very hard, I ask the Owner, for Humans to avoid Close Contact with Others? Sometimes, […]
The Owner is well. It is Day 15 since her Covid began. Now we can go for a Walk. I have been taken for walks by Others but it is not quite the same. There is something about the quality of the Throwing. A Moral Dog walking with a Substitute […]
I ask the Other Dogs if we should still be Licking. Caspar and I are in Favour. However Bercow says he is maintaining a two metre rule, whilst Houdini says he makes a point of never being in the same room, or even street, as his Owner for more than […]
Covid in two 50 somethings in North London has gone like this. One mild. One mild to moderate. The patients are two 58 year olds. One of us had a very mild case. The other had a case that, from a doctor’s point of view, was mild to moderate during […]
Hergest, a Hound's Philosophy 