What is wrong with Disinfectant as a Cure for Covid? I ask. Everything, says the Owner. It is Ridiculous, says the Owner. You have to be more Specific, I say. If you laugh at Donald Trump you merely convince those who Trust him that the problem is not His Ridiculousness […]
The Owner has cried so much into her computer than the space key hasstoppedworking. WhatistheMatter?Iask. TheOwnerdriesher keyboard. I have been reading about People, she says, who have not had chance to say Goodbye. We have to Change This. This Cannot Happen. Some things have to be a Priority. I look […]
Would you like a Bedtime Biscuit? Asks the Owner. No thank you, I whisper. But you always have a bedtime Biscuit, says the Owner. The recipe was created by the late, great Michel Roux. Are you Skulking? I am not Skulking, I say Extremely Quietly, and my Appreciation of Monsieur […]
I do not want to walk that way, I say to the Owner. Why not? Asks the Owner, we always walk that way.There is a Telephone Mast there, I say. I heard it might give me Covid virus.A Telephone Mast cannot give you a Virus, says the Owner. A Virus is […]
Look, says the Owner, how Quiet it is on the Heath. It is not quiet back where we parked, I say. That man was either Playing the Bagpipes or Murdering a Piglet. I am not sure which. That, says the Owner, is the joy of Learning the Bagpipes. But I […]
The Owner has developed an Extremely Peculiar Habit. Her obsession with Collecting the Rear End Offerings of the Moral Dog seem to have extended into Collecting Similar Offerings from Other Dogs. Moreover, she is doing it wearing Blue Plastic Gloves and Strange Round Sunglasses, and carrying a Huge Orange Bag. […]
They are confining Cats indoors if their Owners might have Covid, says the Owner. That sounds an excellent plan, I say, and a Just Punishment for Hissing at the Moral Dog. It is not a punishment, says the Owner. It is a precaution, since Cats seem able to pass Covid […]
Tell me again, I say to the Owner. Tigers, says the Owner. At the Bronx Zoo. Four Tigers and three Lions. They appear to have caught it from a Keeper who had Covid. I believe the Tiger had a cough. How can this be? I ask. You suggested that the […]
Hergest, says the Owner, stop Howling. It is traditional, I say. I need to communicate with the Brotherhood of Dogs, I say. I Howl again. Can you not just speak to them in the Park? Asks the Owner. You may be attracting Hyaenas. No, I say, because our limited exercise […]
The Owner is getting cross. There are so many people making claims about Covid, she says. False Information is Everywhere. People are passing it around like Valuable Currency. Why are People believing it if it is Not True? I ask. Because the People making the claims are Apparent Experts, says […]
The Owner says the Prime Minister and all his Men have Covid. It is quite a coincidence that they all caught it at the same time, I say. How very unlucky that is, I say. Yes, says the Owner. Were they not practising Social Distancing? I ask. It seems not, […]
The Owner and the Man and I go for our Daily Walk on the Heath. There are a few Humans about but they Avoid us by stepping off the path in wide circles. Is it very hard, I ask the Owner, for Humans to avoid Close Contact with Others? Sometimes, […]
The Owner is well. It is Day 15 since her Covid began. Now we can go for a Walk. I have been taken for walks by Others but it is not quite the same. There is something about the quality of the Throwing. A Moral Dog walking with a Substitute […]
I ask the Other Dogs if we should still be Licking. Caspar and I are in Favour. However Bercow says he is maintaining a two metre rule, whilst Houdini says he makes a point of never being in the same room, or even street, as his Owner for more than […]
Everyone is talking about mild, moderate and severe case, and critical cases. What does this mean? There are, as yet, no clear guides for patients to tell them what doctors mean by mild, moderate or severe Covid. Some guidance on classifying illness is appearing in research papers and epidemiological reports, […]
